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Shambling toward a cultural mecca
By Emily Grosvenor
from WillametteLive, Section Opinion
Posted on Sat Oct 31, 2009 at 10:19:11 PM PDT

This is it. The waning minutes before nightfall in downtown Salem, the moment before a zombie attacks. It is the split heartbeat in which the man before you on the side walk is either your neighbor out for a stroll or a brain-devouring, flesh-craving cannibal crawled out of his own grave.

And this is the moment Salem found itself in on Thursday October 22 at 5:59, when it was unclear whether the city would embrace its own inherent zombie-ness, or chalk another cross-community effort up to one more thing that has failed to stick in this town.

To be sure, Salem was more than ready for a zombie attack – for its families and singles and professionals and maybe even a few commuters from neighboring communities to stop drooling and shuffling and start consuming the city’s cultural products.

You know, Salem’s brains.

And it is clear that Salem has a lot on common with zombies. Yes, zombies lack the sexiness of other monster archetypes, just as Salem struggles still to find a sexiness that will get pulses racing without scaring off moms. But the most compelling new zombie incarnations in popular culture aren’t mindless cannibals controlled by an evil force – they really just want to eat your brains.

I am happy to report that the dead have risen in Salem and the brains taste good.

More actual life graced the streets of downtown Salem during the Culture Shock Community Project’s 13 Nights of Halloween than enliven these storied boulevards on most Saturday nights.

I finally saw the signs of a pulse I have been waiting for – starting with the zombie walk, and continuing with zombie yoga, an Ed Wood film festival at the Salem Cinema, a presentation on Haunted Salem, and a screening of Rocky Horror Picture Show, just to name a few – in Salem last month.

But we are still a city that is desperate to be lured out of its self-imposed cemetery by even the most fleeting signs of life.

At 5:30 p.m. the Saturday after the zombie parade, I stood on the breezeway over Chemeketa Street as a few dozen dancers – their eyes blackened, their teeth oozing, their clothes mere rags – pushed themselves up from the asphalt and reenacted the dance sequence from Michael Jackson’s Thriller video for eleven full minutes. Around them, four hundred people, baby buggies and all, watched and cheered as the dancers transformed that everyday zombie shuffle into MJ’s iconic moves.

Zombies always have it in them to move a crowd.

Afterward, a friend and I walked through Salem. We stopped at a convenience store on Liberty Street that was inconveniently closed. We were pushed promptly out of Engelberg Antiks, though the store’s staff had forgotten to lock its doors. We laughed and snarked about how lame Salem can get on a Saturday night.

And then it struck me: Zombies don’t let a little thing like a closed store stop them from finding life. They tear down walls, they scratch through doors. Their hunger for brains is so complete and unrelenting that it drives their every step.

So I leaned on my left foot, dragged my right. My mouth watered, and I shuffled my way to the Book Bin.

A real zombie always needs more brains.




Re: Shambling toward a cultural mecca (#1)
by Anonymous on Mon Nov 02, 2009 at 04:44:42 PM PDT
Yes Salem is "lame" on most nights of the week. There is a reason. Salem has never embraced the idea of a night life. I'm sure you missed the Nights of Halloween Party at Venti's Cafe on Halloween. But that party showed that Salem is getting it. Every Saturday night Venti's has DJ's from Portland come spin House music. But this past Saturday they had three DJ's, one made his Salem debut, DJ Freakbeat. The dancefloor was crowded from 10:30 until they closed at 2 AM. The next thing downtown needs to embrace is the restaurants in Reed Opera House staying open late on the weekends, and the coffee shops too. I have been in Salem a little over a year, and the changes are night and day. I would encourage Salemites to get very involved with the newer and younger community groups that have set up in the past year. These are the folks that are driving the changes in Salem. They all need your help too!

noise ordinance must change (#2)
by Anonymous on Tue Nov 03, 2009 at 10:16:25 AM PDT
Salem will never, ever, have an active nightlife until the strict noise ordinance is changed. It is simple as that. Salem has one of the strictest noise ordinances in the state and almost every single live music and dance club has been shut down because of it. Just see what is happening to The Space right now on Broadway, neighbors in the luxury apartments across the street are calling the cops, sometimes at 8 or 9 p.m. on a Friday night. Who would want to deal with that? The Sip closed due to noise complaints from music, The Governor's Cup stopped having music because of complaints, the list goes on and on.

Keep Salem "lame"!!! (#3)
by Anonymous on Wed Nov 04, 2009 at 12:20:07 AM PDT
The fact that we are not like almost every other city, filled with boring night clubs where STDs get spread by touching the doors make us a better place to live. We should be proud to be more decent than Portland and Eugene, and try to conserve the mystery that comes with being different. Salem is a very nice town as it is. Don't change it, please. A respectable town is very hard to come by these days.

Good thing the lame stay at home (#4)
by Anonymous on Wed Nov 04, 2009 at 07:28:48 AM PDT
STD's don't get spread by doorknobs, that's a medical fact. Lame ideas and misinformation, it seems, do get spread on message boards. I don't know how having a cultural life in a city ruins a respectable town. There is nothing respectable or charming about being known for your prison systems, your poverty, and a cultural scene that encourages many professionals to live an hour away.

Moron (#5)
by Anonymous on Thu Nov 05, 2009 at 01:21:20 PM PDT
You clearly don't know what a metaphor is... And culture and nightlife are two very different things.

Morons and their kind (#6)
by Anonymous on Fri Nov 06, 2009 at 08:43:31 AM PDT
I do know that real cultured people don't refer to others in the public sphere as morons or resort to other infantile name-calling under the guise of public conversation. People that do this are called "trolls," and for good reason.

Sick of this (#7)
by Anonymous on Wed Nov 25, 2009 at 09:10:09 PM PDT
The truth is that most people who live in Salem like it the way it is. The beautiful parks, the restaurants, the comparative quiet. . . It is a more family-driven city than a retail-driven city. Oh, yes-- we could use a town paper that actually totes the greatness of Salem instead of "desperately seeking" this idyllic "cultural mecca". Salem may be Eugene and Portland's smaller, plainer sister-- but I'm not complaining! Yes-- keep Salem boring and lame!

most people? (#8)
by Anonymous on Mon Dec 14, 2009 at 10:48:39 AM PDT
Keeping Salem boring and lame is a great idea! Jobs? Who needs 'em? Music, art, community, why bother? Why build a bustling, vibrant city full of economic opportunity, meaningful engagement and varied cultures when we could just fill up at McDonald's (hey, maybe that one inside Walmart!) and then settle in for some quality time in front of the tube? I know a lot of people in Salem, and none of them are like the "most people" you describe. A great "family driven" city is one where there are jobs aplenty, kid friendly cultural experiences AND great events where mom and dad can get out and shake it for the night. Have you ever seen Footloose, or basically any coming of age movie? Sleepy little towns don't equal happy families. Don't let Salem be a place that young, smart, energetic people can't wait to leave.

A 20something's perspective (#9)
by Anonymous on Mon Dec 14, 2009 at 11:15:52 AM PDT
When Salemites actively work towards establishing a local culture, they're effectively telling college-bound teenagers, urban professionals, and the hundreds of educated, upwardly mobile young people who have arrived here via Willamette or other means that we should stick around. "Spend money! Enrich the economy! Raise families! Give back to this community and help it grow!" Whereas people like Mr. Keep Salem Lame up there tell us to "Go away! We don't want your money or your schooling or your positive attitudes! You're not wanted!" News flash: A stagnant community that rejects change and new ideas is NOT a good place to raise a family, no matter how quiet it may be.

How about just being honest? (#10)
by Anonymous on Mon Dec 14, 2009 at 12:06:39 PM PDT
If you are looking at the bubble that is Willamette University and say that we should be reaching out to those students, forget about it. Willamette could be picked up and dropped into any number of cities and the campus and most students wouldn't notice. The city government has given a priority to developers of shopping centers, office complexes, and industrial warehouses. It's not focusing on the arts, because the arts do not pay property taxes. It doesn't matter if these huge pieces of concrete will join other huge pieces of vacant concrete in the city. Both sides of this issue are wrong. "Wahh, keep Salem lame". Then you have people saying out of one side of their mouth, "Wahh, we don't have anything to do." and then using the other side to say "Wahh, noone supports us when we do things!" The long and the short of it is that the population will do whatever it is that they want to do. Pretending something exists when it doesn't is equally ridiculous to complaining about nothing to do while going to Portland every weekend. If you like to go to Portland, go to Portland and stop complaining about Salem. If you would prefer to do something in Salem, support places who promote new things in Salem that are more to your liking. That's right put your money where your mouth is. Don't volunteer your time, there's plenty of people wanting to do everything. Open your wallet and pay for admission. You don't create culture, it just is.

well, sort of. (#11)
by Anonymous on Mon Dec 14, 2009 at 04:33:44 PM PDT
Before I can pay to attend a fabulous event in Salem, said event has to exist. If you build it, they will come.


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